Here’s the thing: I like to talk. I like to talk about my experiences and share what goes through my mind and open up the discussion, because if I’m feeling a certain way, then someone else is, too. 

So I want to start another little series for my blog that I can publish periodically that maybe sheds a little light on some terms that the body acceptance/wellness community uses.

So, as I learn new terms and think about terms I throw around (and assume OTHER people already know), I decided I want to try to stop and talk about these specific terms. Hence the name of this series, “Coming to Terms.”

My first installment in this every-so-often series is the term “body checking.” 

And, incidentally, this is a timely topic since this weekend I’ve found myself doing this constantly. It’s been a tough weekend for body image.

I said “body checking” on the phone to one of my friends recently, and we had a little discussion about it, and I learned that she also body-checked often. 

After doing a little bit of research and reading about it, seeing articles about the underlying causes and what the implications could be, I decided that I felt confident enough to write a little bit about it. 

So, what is it? 

Body checking is focusing on your body or specific parts of your body, usually obsessively, in the hopes that it will provide some relief from body image stress. 

(Surprise, surprise: it usually doesn’t provide the relief we’re looking for. Instead, it can make our feelings of body image stress worse over time and continue the pattern of negative thoughts. Yikes.)

In a few past blog posts I’ve been very vocal about my food struggles and disordered eating behaviors that I (and many of us) deal with every day. Body checking is often labeled as one of those behaviors. 

And what does it look like?

Well, I can only really speak for myself, but here are a few examples from my own existence that might illustrate the concept. 

Let’s say I just finished eating a bowl of shrimp fettuccine for dinner. It was incredible, as shrimp fettuccine usually is. Groundbreaking. Life-changing. 

But, like a normal human being, after I finish my food, my stomach is a little bloated. And I know that for me, once I finish eating, that’s when the body checking begins. My hands are always on my stomach. I’m picking at the fat on my belly. If I’m sitting and I can feel my belly rolls, I’m constantly running my hands along my skin, almost willing the fat to disappear. 

Or, here’s one that I never even noticed until recently: every time I go to the bathroom, I stand at the mirror and pick apart my appearance. I suck in my stomach. I turn my head sideways to obsess over my double chin. I lean close to the mirror and look at the fine hairs on my cheeks, above my lips, and between my eyebrows. 

I do it every. Single. Time. Every time I close that bathroom door, I stare at myself in the mirror for a minute or two. And I never thought anything of it, until I happened to come across a post about body checking on Instagram.

And I thought, “Hey, I do that.” And the more I thought about it, the more it occurred to me how often I do it. And now, I’m more cognizant of WHEN I do it, so that I can give myself a little bit of a break, but it’s a multiple-times-daily occurrence. 

So I know it is for at least one person reading this, too.

For me, I know the body checking manifests itself in squeezing parts of my body, running my hands over my hips or my cellulite or my stretch marks, or scrutinizing myself in the mirror every time I’m in front of one, but that’s not what it always looks like.

It can also be constantly focusing on how your clothes fit. It can be constantly weighing yourself, using a scale to determine even the smallest fluctuation of your body. 

Body checking is a compulsive behavior that reinforces the emotions surrounding negative body image. And the real kicker for me is how OFTEN I do it and how mindless it is. It sounds weird to type, but I squeeze my own ass A LOT. I grab my own thighs A LOT. 

I guess we have to get action somewhere, right?

Jokes aside, it really does happen constantly, and there usually are not positive emotions in my mind when I AM obsessing. The relief I’m seeking? Yeah, I don’t usually find it. 

Once we start noticing our body checking behaviors, we can identify when we engage in those behaviors. Is it usually after you eat? Is it after you exercise? Before or after you shower? Every time you’re in the bathroom and near a scale or a mirror?

Identifying when these behaviors occur can help us notice a pattern, which in turn can help us resist those same behaviors the next time. Knowing what we’re up against is the first step to pretty much everything, so good for us for getting to that point.

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Thanks for sticking with me in my first installment of “Coming to Terms.” I have a few other terms in mind to talk about with you guys eventually, and I’m excited to do a little research and share what I find with you guys!